It’s Time to Take Notice

When it comes to the institution of marriage I find that there is a very thin line between being comfortable and being happy. I have been married now for 14 years and please don’t get me wrong, I have an awful lot to be thankful for. I am lucky to be with a woman that loves me and still wants me, and I love my wife very much as well. But here is the rub, in recent years I have realized that instead of being happy I am very comfortable.

Something positive I’m sure has to be said for being comfortable with the one that you have promised to spend the rest of your life with, but when you take a mental inventory of your life from when you and your significant other took the plunge to however long you have been married and you find that you have mistaken being comfortable with being truly happy in your marriage it is time for an adjustment to be made.

Now, when I mention adjustment I’m not necessarily talking divorce. Although, there are times when that may very well be the only thing that can be done. What I mean firstly is to sit down with your significant other and have a good long heart-to-heart. Because if you’re not happy the way you want to be, then communication with your spouse is needed.

Being married for 14 years doesn’t make me an expert in marriage by any stretch of the imagination, it only allows me to relate my personal opinion of marriage and how I think that marital issues should be dealt with. Being comfortable to me in a marriage is knowing each other through and through without any rude awakenings. What I have learned is that there is a certain level of good and bad to that.

The fact that there are no surprises can be construed as a good thing, but it can also be construed as a bad thing when that fact makes you wonder if you’re truly happy or going through the motions simply because you’re comfortable with who you’re married to. I am for a level of comfort but not to the extent that it makes you wonder where happiness will come from.

Marriage is a wonderful institution and I am all for it. That being said, I believe that it is very important for both man and wife to be happy in every respect and know that to grow in happiness together is just as important if not more so than just merely being with the other because you know there will be no unknown surprises.